Choco Teaches Da Dumb Humans!

'Ello! Welcome to another 'dition of...

...CHOCO Teaches da Dumb Humans!

Today da CHOCO gonna talk about Chrissmus. Chrissmus is a weird human thing dat da CHOCO no can understand very much, but CHOCO sure da CHOCO understand better dan da humans, so let's get started.

Chrissmus is a time when da humans bring trees into their houses and hang little glass balls on da trees and put lights on dem. CHOCO know: humans are weird! Also, da humans take their socks and hang them in the living room instead of in drawers. Also, da humans have fun playing presents!

Here's how U can play presents: First, U go to a store and U buy somethin' dat U want! Then U put paper on it so da friend no can tell what it is, den you give it to dat friend. Dat friend no want what U bought--U want it! But that OK. It will all make sense in a minute (at least as much as da dumb dumb humans ever make sense!) U friend do the same thing to U. Den U both tear da paper off da thing U is given in front of the other human, and U then tell dat human how much U really like what they give U. Den U take that thing back to the store, get U money back, and buy for Uself da thing dat U gave da other person! Dat called Playing Presents!

Why don't da dumb dumb humans just buy demselves what dey want in da first place? CHOCO don't know. But that OK! There is a lot of things humans do that don't make no sense to da CHOCO.

There more to Chrissmas than all dat, but CHOCO no have time to go into it now. Maybe CHOCO write more later about da Chrissmas. Or maybe not! CHOCO don't know!

Choco I Forrige U

'Ello. Dis is da CHOCO! It been a long time, hasn't it?

Da CHOCO I Forrige U. Da CHOCO try not to do dat again.

But if da CHOCO do do it again, what U gonna do about it? Huh? Huh? Huh?

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Da CHOCO just say "do do." Dat like doo doo. Dat like dawg poop!

Anyway, da CHOCO no write 'cause da CHOCO is moving with Meradiff and Natalia's family. 'Cause da CHOCO is PART of Meradiff and Natalia's family!

(Even if da Meradiff and Natalia's mama want da CHOCO to go away!)

So da CHOCO been moving his stuff! Dis picture is taken in da CHOCO's new closet. What U think? CHOCO like, but not like da lighting. It not pleasing. Plus also, it make da CHOCO's favorite chair look brown. It not brown! It red! Dat obvious!

So CHOCO try to write more. CHOCO next entry be about Chrissmus. Dat somethin' about da dumb dumb humans dat da CHOCO not understand, but maybe da CHOCO try to explain.

Next time.

CHOCO Answers da Mail!

'Ello! Dis is da CHOCO , and today it time for another 'stallment of CHOCO Answers da Mail!

Today's letter from some human calling herself da Giant Lollipop! She write dis:

Hi Choco how are you doing.well I was just wondering if you could help me you see I have this bird and he bites me alot how do I get him to stop?

'Ello, Giant Lollipop. First, to answer U first question, da CHOCO is muy bien! Gracias for asking dat one. U betcha!

As for da other question about da flappy bird dat bites, CHOCO have some secret to tell U: Not all flappy birds is flappy birds. Some flappy birds is actually chocos, and those chocos maybe sometimes try to menudo da humans! 'Specially da human kids 'cause dey is Xtra tasty!

So watch out for da flappy bird, Giant Lollipop. Da flappy bird maybe tryin' to menudo U! Maybe U better never never never go near da Flappy bird again!

Sincerely,

da CHOCO

P.S. What kinda name is Giant Lollipop! CHOCO think maybe dat not U real name.

P.P.S. U not spell da CHOCO's name good. It all in da capitals.

P.P.P.S CHOCO type "P.P" in da word "P.P.S"

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Dat a 'larious joke!